Whether or not you have read my post on helicopter parenting…I think the research shows that “hovering” as parents is a no-no. It is so detrimental to kids and it is a travesty of justice for kids. But now there is an issue with teachers being led into hover mode.
What another insane travesty of justice.
In school systems where parents have 24/7 access to their students’ grades and access to all the upcoming assignments, and quiz and test dates for their students through a learning platform, why are teachers required to call/email a parent when a student fails a test? Why on earth do parents have to be specifically notified? If parents want to hover and helicopter, this is the one area where they actually should be a little over the top. But ironically, most are not.
Many of the same reasons that make hover parenting bad, also make hover-teaching bad. Let’s look at entitlement. So the child fails, the teacher calls the parent and the parent wants to know why the child failed. Hello? Your child doesn’t study. Your child doesn’t prepare for class. Your child doesn’t care. Why? Because a parent that doesn’t hold kids accountable for their grades gives that child an open invitation to entitlement.
Think about it: Mom and/or Dad know that Junior isn’t studying. He is playing video games. Or hanging out with friends. He may even be working. But if he isn’t studying, he is not preparing for his job as a student. So, when Junior (or Suzie-Q) fails, Mom/Dad really don’t have any recourse. They have allowed the child to forgo studying, so how can they legitimately get angry when he/she didn’t pass?
Chronic complainers? Yes! Kids who don’t study and don’t pass are generally the ones who complain about the test or the teacher or the school or anything else that doesn’t go exactly they way they want it. They are entitled, so they know for certain that it is not their own fault that they failed. “This wasn’t on the study guide/We didn’t get a study guide.” Guess what, there is no study guide for life or for your job/career. What then?
At what point do we hold the students responsible for their actions or inaction, as the case may be. The teacher has to notify the parent. Really? Can the parent not talk to the child? Can the child actually be held accountable?
I was, and I am pretty sure you were, also. In the 70s and 80s, how many times did our parents blame teachers for our bad grades? How often did our parents get a phone call about a failing grade we made? They didn’t. And they didn’t have instant access to grades.
Our parents got a report card once every 6 or 9 weeks, and it had to be signed and returned to school the next day. That was it. They knew about those things, not because they had a learning platform on a computer that was updated daily, but because they took an interest in our education and asked us what we were doing in school.
Let’s face it, anyone who doesn’t hold kids accountable is responsible for the anxiety and lack of confidence these students have. In the same way that helicopter parenting damages kids, helicopter teaching has a similar outcome.
Should parents know their kids have failed a test? Yes!
Should the teacher have to be a helicopter figure to let the parents know? No!
If parents take the initiative to know what their child is doing in school, the child will be more likely to take the initiative to do better. If not, the parents must force the issue with the child. The parents. Not the teacher.
We are raising the future here. We need them to be confident, non-entitled adults ready to take on the world by themselves, not just because someone is forcing them to do so.
Sorry for the rant, I just get a little heated sometimes!
Anyway, what are your thoughts on this?